This submit was initially printed on Defender Community
By Laura Onyeneho
When Venita Graves launched her nonprofit Magnificence Past Breast Most cancers in 2010, she wasn’t chasing accolades or entrepreneurship. She was answering a calling.
A hairstylist and most cancers survivor herself, Graves acknowledged a painful void for ladies, particularly Black ladies, present process therapy.
“When a lady loses her hair, her eyebrows, her lashes, there’s a sure disappointment that comes with that,” she says. “And I knew we wanted an area the place ladies may really feel lovely once more,actually really feel it, not simply fake.”
Throughout from her suite at Salon Meyerland, Graves created a wig boutique. The partitions are lined with vibrant wigs in each shade and texture, rigorously chosen to replicate the sweetness and variety of the ladies who stroll via her doorways. However what actually defines this area is the vitality.
“We discuss, we snicker, we cry, we pray typically all in the identical hour,” Graves says. “I don’t simply need them to seize a wig and go. I need them to depart right here feeling complete once more.”
The mission was born from Graves’s personal expertise navigating breast most cancers as a stylist. She started volunteering at MD Anderson Most cancers Heart, serving to ladies select wigs and educating them tie scarves with dignity. However over time, she seen that many ladies, significantly ladies of coloration, left with wigs that didn’t match their aesthetic, tradition or fashion.
“They had been primary,” Graves says. “We like aptitude. We like selection. I wished to offer ladies wigs that mirrored who they had been earlier than most cancers,and who they may very well be after.”
At the moment, Magnificence Past Breast Most cancers serves lots of of girls every year, lots of whom stroll in unsure and depart remodeled.
Survivor’s Testimony
Angela Worth-Hardeman’s breast most cancers journey was as a lot emotional because it was bodily and it almost broke her spirit.
“I assumed I used to be a brick home,” she says with a bittersweet snicker, “36G and assured. My breasts had been my signature. So when medical doctors instructed me I wanted a double mastectomy, I instructed them I’d moderately die.”
Worth-Hardeman was identified with triple-negative breast most cancers, stage two, grade three, on Labor Day weekend in 2022. It was a shock, however not a complete shock. Her grandmother had battled breast most cancers, and Worth-Hardeman had already raised considerations about discomfort in her breast months earlier than the official analysis.
“I knew one thing was mistaken. I instructed the primary physician, however they brushed it off after the mammogram got here again clear,” she says. “I pushed for a second opinion once I acquired a brand new physician. Thank God I did. She insisted on extra testing, and that’s after they discovered it.”
Her identification was as soon as tied carefully to her bodily type, but it surely was stripped down. When she regarded within the mirror, she didn’t acknowledge herself.
“I misplaced my eyebrows, lashes, my breasts, my weight,” she says. “I didn’t wish to depart the home.”
However amid her lowest level, Magnificence Past Breast Most cancers discovered her. Worth-Hardeman credit Graves and the expertise with serving to restore her outer look and sense of self-worth.
“Miss Venita made me really feel lovely once more,” she says. “She gave me a wig that jogged my memory of me, the previous me, the daring me. And she or he didn’t cease there. She prayed with me. She hugged me. She noticed me.”
Redefining the that means of magnificence after breast most cancers was a difficult journey for Kimberly Williams. Magnificence as soon as lived within the bounce of her curls, the energy in her smile and the boldness that got here from merely being herself. However in 2021, a breast most cancers analysis challenged all the pieces she thought she knew about her look and her identification.
She had stage 3 breast most cancers. Remedy would require 16 weeks of chemotherapy, lumpectomy, and radiation day-after-day for 30 days. The method can be bodily grueling, however for Williams, one of the tough components was shedding her hair.
“I used to be recognized for my hair,” she mentioned. “It was an enormous a part of my identification. I didn’t assume I used to be useless till I watched it fall out.”
At first, she tried to carry on, however ultimately, the mirror compelled her to decide. With tears in her eyes, she shaved her head.
“That day was one of many lowest,” Williams recalled. “I felt like a unique individual. I didn’t see magnificence anymore, I noticed illness.”
Magnificence isn’t what you see on journal covers. It’s what you see when a lady seems at herself once more with delight. When she says, ‘I nonetheless acquired it.’ That’s magnificence. And that’s what we do right here.
Venita Graves, Founding father of Magnificence Past Breast Most cancers
A cousin in Georgia mailed her high-quality wigs that resembled her pure curls. She started experimenting with make-up once more, discovering pleasure in routines that made her really feel complete. She documented her journey in photographs, typically glamorous, typically tearful, however at all times actual.
“Even once I cried, I took photos,” she mentioned. “I wished to see myself as I used to be, not simply how most cancers made me look.”
She additionally leaned into self-care, massages, skincare, journaling, prayer. These small acts helped her reconnect with a model of magnificence that had little to do with outward look and all the pieces to do with how she felt in her pores and skin.
“I additionally took half in Venita’s calendar photoshoots for breast most cancers survivors,” she mentioned. “It helped me reclaim a part of myself. She created an environment of empowerment as a substitute of pity.”
Photoshoots and Runways
Certainly one of Graves’ signature initiatives is the annual Magnificence Past Breast Most cancers Calendar, which options 11 survivors every year in full glam, hair, make-up and wardrobe captured in a celebratory photoshoot.
“It’s greater than a calendar,” Graves explains. “It’s a souvenir. It’s proof to every girl that she continues to be right here, nonetheless glowing, nonetheless radiant.”
The calendars function the initiative’s essential fundraiser, serving to to maintain the area operating and inventory new wigs. However maybe no occasion matches the emotional magnitude of the annual style present.
“It’s not your typical New York runway,” Graves laughs. “That is pleasure on show. That is ladies strolling in energy some after shedding breasts, hair, even limbs. However honey, after they strut, they personal that stage.”
When requested what she hopes Magnificence Past Breast Most cancers teaches society about magnificence, Graves doesn’t hesitate.
“Magnificence isn’t what you see on journal covers. It’s what you see when a lady seems at herself once more with delight. When she says, ‘I nonetheless acquired it.’ That’s magnificence. And that’s what we do right here.”
