There are moments when the load of my story presses so onerous in opposition to my chest that I’m wondering if I’ll ever breathe freely. Being HIV-positive for over 20 years has taught me resilience, nevertheless it has additionally uncovered me to a world that usually doesn’t know learn how to embrace individuals like me. I’ve realized to navigate love, stigma, and survival whereas elevating three kids in a society that also whispers about HIV in hushed, fearful tones.
However I refuse to be a whisper.
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I used to be 19 when an HIV testing counselor slid a paper with a giant purple plus check in a circle in entrance of me, confirming my prognosis with a silent nod. On the time, HIV was deeply misunderstood, particularly in Black communities. I internalized that concern, believing I’d by no means discover love, have kids, or reside previous a sure age. The silence and disgrace practically swallowed me entire.
From Silence to Advocacy
For years, I struggled underneath the load of stigma — till the day I made a decision to struggle again.
My advocacy work turned my objective. As a spokesmodel for the HIV Stops With Me marketing campaign, I put my face to a trigger that so many concern. I serve on the New York Metropolis HIV Planning Group, making certain insurance policies mirror the wants of these they have an effect on. Each day, I stand in areas the place Black girls, HIV-positive people, and single moms are sometimes missed — and I demand that we be seen.
Because of this Nationwide Black HIV/AIDS Consciousness Day, Feb. 7, is crucial. It’s not nearly schooling; it’s about empowerment. It’s about ensuring Black girls know their value, their rights, and their energy.
The Actuality for Black Girls and HIV
Black girls make up over half of latest HIV diagnoses amongst girls within the U.S. regardless of being solely 13% of the feminine inhabitants. This disparity isn’t about habits—it’s about entry. Restricted healthcare, systemic racism, medical distrust, and financial inequality all play a task. But, our voices are sometimes lacking from bigger conversations about HIV.
I’ve devoted my life to altering that. As a linkage to care specialist, I’ve helped numerous newly identified people take their first steps towards therapy and self-acceptance. I’ve labored with individuals who sat in the identical darkness I as soon as did—believing their lives had been over. I’ve seen the tears, the concern, and the disgrace. However I’ve additionally witnessed transformation. With the best help, individuals don’t simply survive HIV — they thrive.
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For a lot of Black girls, nevertheless, thriving is a battle. We face stigma not simply as individuals dwelling with HIV, however as Black girls in a society that already marginalizes us. The judgment we endure — from healthcare suppliers, companions, and even our communities — makes it tougher to hunt therapy, disclose our standing, or demand higher care. HIV stigma is killing us sooner than the virus itself.
The present administration’s insurance policies have additionally had a profound impression on individuals dwelling with HIV, particularly Black girls dealing with intersectional struggles. Regardless of some optimistic strides, the rollback of healthcare protections, the erosion of the Inexpensive Care Act, and the politicization of healthcare have created an surroundings the place stigma thrives.
HIV Is Not a Crime — However It Feels Like One
I do know firsthand how discrimination can take every little thing from you. Regardless of being on therapy, wholesome, and undetectable, I used to be pushed out of employment attributable to my standing. I turned homeless, left to struggle for survival in a world that noticed me as a legal responsibility. My standing was used as a weapon in opposition to me, reinforcing the harmful actuality that HIV stigma is extra highly effective than the virus itself.
Because of this HIV Is Not a Crime Consciousness Day, Feb. 28, additionally issues. Throughout the nation, individuals dwelling with HIV are criminalized for his or her standing — dealing with arrests, job loss, and even jail sentences for merely present. HIV criminalization legal guidelines are outdated, unscientific, and disproportionately impression Black individuals and ladies. These legal guidelines don’t mirror trendy science, which reveals that undetectable individuals can’t transmit the virus. But, they continue to be in place, punishing individuals for a medical situation.
Entry to reasonably priced therapy is a day by day battle for a lot of, and we’re witnessing a technology of Black girls, already susceptible to HIV, being left behind. For me, and lots of others, it’s a continuing struggle in opposition to a system that appears to care little in regards to the lives of HIV-positive people. The financial boundaries are actual. With out entry to correct care, individuals dwelling with HIV, particularly these in Black and Brown communities, proceed to be susceptible to falling into deeper disparities.
I communicate my fact not for sympathy, however for change. I inform my story as a result of I do know that somebody, someplace, wants to listen to it. Somebody must know that they don’t seem to be alone, that they don’t seem to be damaged, and that HIV doesn’t outline them.
I’ve survived homelessness, melancholy, and discrimination. I’ve raised my kids by hardship. I’ve fought to be right here.
And I’m nonetheless right here. Unapologetically alive.