Editor’s be aware: The next article is an op-ed, and the views expressed are the creator’s personal. Learn extra opinions on theGrio.
At 58, I did one thing I by no means imagined I’d do: I wrote a e book. Not as a result of I wanted one other title. Not as a result of I aspired to be an creator. I wrote “No Apologies” as a result of, for the primary time in my life, I had the braveness to inform my reality.
The reality a few boy from a small Southern city who dreamed past the borders of what he may see. The reality in regards to the pressures that hardened me, the identities I carried in silence, the expectations that weighed me down, and the liberty that finally set me by myself path.
And that freedom started in a spot that can all the time really feel like residence: Howard College.
I grew up in Statesboro, Georgia, a world constructed on self-discipline, obligation, and doing what needed to be executed. My father who was sensible, decided, and armed with solely a sixth-grade schooling constructed companies that sustained our group. He anticipated me to inherit that life. However whilst a baby, I wished extra. I devoured encyclopedias, memorized maps, and imagined a life that stretched far past our city’s borders.
I didn’t have the phrases for it then, however what I longed for was house.Area to breathe. Area to develop. Area to easily be me totally, freely, and with out apology.
Howard gave me that house.
Strolling onto the Yard within the Nineteen Eighties was like taking my first full breath. I noticed Black brilliance in each route: mental, political, inventive, eccentric, formidable, unapologetic. For the primary time, I noticed Black folks residing expansively as an alternative of defensively. For the primary time, I felt each liked and seen.
Howard didn’t simply educate me, it liberated me. It confirmed me that identification shouldn’t be one thing to shrink; it’s one thing to honor, to discover, to face in with satisfaction.
HBCUs do this higher than any establishments on this nation. For college students like me who’re Black, formidable, queer, curious, and looking out HBCUs aren’t simply colleges. They’re lifelines. At Howard, I realized to query the world, to query myself, and to know that achievement didn’t require erasing who I used to be. I realized that group may very well be a delicate touchdown, not a battleground. And I realized, perhaps for the primary time, what it felt prefer to belong.
That basis carried me by way of every part that got here after. There have been the early company years the place I usually felt like an outsider, the cities the place I chased group, the heartbreaks, the silence round my sexuality, the well being analysis that shook me, the rebuilding that saved me. Each reinvention had Howard’s fingerprints on it.
Even a long time later, in my fifties, when life slowed me down and compelled me to replicate, I discovered myself returning to these classes from the Yard. That’s why I wrote “No Apologies.” As a result of I do know I’m not alone. I do know I’m not the one one who needed to unlearn survival. I’m not the one one carrying the burden of expectations. I’m not the one one who wanted to recollect who they have been earlier than the world insisted on telling them who to be.
This e book is not only a memoir.It’s an invite — a name to return residence to your self.
And for me, that “residence” will all the time begin with an HBCU.
Generally I fear we take these establishments without any consideration. We assume they are going to all the time be right here, all the time sturdy, all the time tasked with shaping Black excellence era after era. However the reality is that this: HBCUs survive as a result of we proceed to inform the world why they matter.
Howard gave me my life. It gave me the braveness to stroll away from paths that weren’t mine. It taught me the distinction between merely surviving and totally residing. It taught me to like myself — loudly, quietly, utterly — even when the world made that difficult.
If “No Apologies” stands for something, it’s this:You deserve a life that displays your spirit, not your fears.And in the event you’re fortunate, you’ll discover a place — like Howard — that helps you develop into who you have been all the time meant to be.
I wrote this e book as a result of I lastly perceive that reality. I wrote it for anybody nonetheless looking out. And I wrote it as a love letter to the establishment that noticed me lengthy earlier than I realized to see myself.
HBCUs don’t simply educate us.They fortify us.They provide us language, braveness, and group. They train us to stay with out apology.
And for that, I’ll endlessly be grateful.
Charlie Lewis, Jr. is an award-winning Affiliate Dealer at Compass and a distinguished way of life actual property agent. He’s authored his debut e book titled “No Apologies.: Love the Approach You Reside, at Any Age”. Within the Netflix present “Ceaselessly”, the character “Uncle Charlie” is predicated on Charlie. He’s the real-life buddy of present creator Mara Brock Akil. The character was impressed by Charlie’s deep love for his group and alma mater, Howard College.
