If the relationship area wasn’t scary sufficient, TikTok consumer Reesa Teesa’s video sequence, titled “Who TF Did I Marry,” will certainly go away any individual feeling terrified. In a 50-part sequence, Teesa particulars her expertise assembly, relationship, marrying and divorcing a “pathological liar” that she known as “Legion” to thousands and thousands of viewers.
Teesa by no means imagined that this is able to be her actuality. In 2020, she thought she met “the one.” Nonetheless, she discovered herself entangled in a scenario that she, alongside along with her many thousands and thousands of followers, can solely describe as a Lifetime film.
Teesa bares all of it throughout her retelling of the story, giving viewers “the nice, the dangerous, the ugly, the embarrassing, [and] most significantly, the redemption and the forgiveness.” Starting on February 14, she advised the total, true and uncooked story in 10-minute increments, regardless of how she might have been perceived by others. Her solely hope was that she would attain the individuals, particularly girls, who wanted it.
“I do notice that this sequence has gone utterly viral, however I’m glad to see that persons are having conversations about it,” she says in a not too long ago uploaded video. “Extra importantly, I’m glad to see that it’s serving to somebody, even when it is only one individual. That was the aim of placing this video sequence up.”
Every a part of the jaw-dropping, unbelievable story is filled with priceless classes for each men and women within the relationship world. Listed here are seven takeaways from Teesa’s 50-part video sequence, “Who TF Did I Marry.”
Don’t Make Vital Selections Based mostly on the Incorrect Feelings
Teesa admits that she married “Legion” for the flawed causes.
“Once I pull again the layers of this entire monstrosity of life that I lived for 2020 and 2021, it actually does boil right down to the truth that I really did marry him extra out of concern than anything,” she mentioned.
Teesa made a number of the most essential selections in her life rapidly, throughout the onset of the 2020 lockdowns, primarily based on concern and spiritual disgrace. These feelings made it simpler for her to maintain pushing apart the crimson flags and the fixed lies. In life, and particularly in relationship, it’s important that you simply make selections primarily based on sound reasoning, and never concern.
Belief Your Intestine
Teesa acknowledges that she ignored all the crimson flags and the non secular indicators from the start of the sequence. Her ex-husband confirmed her “official paperwork,” manipulating her into believing every thing he mentioned was true. It brought on her to second guess herself, regardless of figuring out in her intestine that one thing was flawed.
“To my sisters, … if one thing doesn’t sit proper with you, examine it,” she suggested. “I excused away quite a lot of stuff that I hope the following girl who sees this doesn’t excuse as a result of I don’t want this on anyone.”
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Imagine a Individual When They Present You Who They Are
There have been a number of instances that “Legion” confirmed Teesa his true colours. She shared totally different incidents throughout the first few months of them being collectively, the place he made her wait over three hours after a surgical procedure, held cellphone conversations and instantly turned defensive, and different crimson flags.
She caught him in a serious lie, after he spent weeks making her imagine that he put a proposal on their future home. Nonetheless, she made the acutely aware resolution to let it go. There was no approach that she might have recognized how deep it went at this level within the relationship; nonetheless, trying again on it, she will be able to see all the instances he revealed who he actually was to her. Oftentimes, individuals will present you who they’re via their actions. It’s essential to not rationalize away their conduct and take it at face worth.
Be Weary of Showboating
One factor that she mentioned “Legion” all the time did was brag about three particular issues. “Anytime he obtained round my household, … he would all the time discuss cash and he would all the time brag,” she mentioned. “He would all the time brag about the truth that he might combat, the truth that he had cash and the truth that he performed soccer.”
She admits not noticing his braggadocious methods till the tip of the connection and refers to his demeanor round her household as one other “crimson flag to place within the ‘United Nations of Pink Flags.’” Be cautious of those that are always inflating their ego. This can be an indication of somebody who isn’t an excellent match.
Don’t Keep in a Relationship for the Incorrect Causes
Teesa says she stayed within the relationship as a result of she didn’t need to be alone, didn’t need to look silly for it ending so rapidly and she or he was able to get married. She cites these three causes, particularly her deep want to be a spouse, because the issues that dominated most of her selections. In the end, nonetheless, these are the issues that stored her within the poisonous relationship.
It’s simpler mentioned than completed, as a result of all of us need love and to lastly obtain our “fortunately ever after.” But it surely’s essential to be sure you’re in a relationship for the suitable causes, akin to belief, love, shared values, morals and objectives.
Belief is the Basis for a Wholesome Relationship
After Teesa caught him in a lie about the home, the belief between the 2 of them was damaged. Within the movies, she admits to trying up public jail information, looking his telephones, working background checks and scouring social media for his relations.
Belief is a foundational piece in any relationship. With out belief, the connection won’t work. As she displays on her expertise, she refuses to ever place herself in an area once more, the place she needs to be an investigator. It’s one other signal that the connection just isn’t a proper match.
Discover Consolation Being Alone
Earlier than getting into into any relationship, it’s important to seek out consolation in being alone. Teesa admits on the finish of the sequence that she doesn’t even bear in mind herself earlier than assembly him. This expertise utterly modified her life.
If something, Teesa’s story serves as a story that it’s higher to be alone than be with somebody who doesn’t worth you.
“There’s a degree of cruelty to my ex-husband that I had by no means skilled earlier than, and God is aware of, I pray I by no means expertise it once more,” she mentioned. “Being single sucks … however being married to the flawed individual is a kind of hell nobody ought to need to undergo.”
